The Tale of the Guard’s Armour, or Patrick Tells a Story

By the look of things, an outside viewer would never have guessed that it was nearly bedtime at the Turner home. Every lamp was lit and music blared from the phonograph player. The supper dishes sat piled in the sink, greasy newspapers from the chip shop covered the table, and a basket of laundry sat in the hallway. Perhaps most extraordinary of all was the winding row of dominos that snaked through the entire sitting room.

While this same observer might not recognize the evening routine, they could be certain of one thing: Mrs. Turner was not at home.

“Please, Daddy, please let me put the last one down,” cajoled the junior member of the construction crew. “I’ve been so patient. Please?”

Patrick Turner lay on the floor, his legs at awkward angles so as to not disturb the tiled masterpiece. His chin was pressed to the floor, and one eye was squinted shut. “I’ll tell you what, sweetheart. Let me set the last one, and when we’ve both moved you can start the show. Deal?”

“Deal.”

Patrick finished placing the tile and gingerly rose to his feet with a groan. “I might pay for that tomorrow,” he muttered. Hands on his hips, he surveyed the serpentine that had taken over the room. With a satisfied smile, he clapped his hands together enthusiastically and announced, “Ready, Angela?”

“Ready, Dad!”Angela deftly tiptoed over to her father. She held out her hand.

“Good luck, Dad,” she smiled.

“Good luck, Angela,” and they dramatically shook hands.

“Drum roll, please, Dad.”

And with the roll of an imaginary snare drum, she sent the first tile down.

All sounds in the house muted but for the click of tiles hitting each other as the line collapsed in slow-motion. The two engineers held their breath, silent prayers going up that the line would collapse uninterrupted.

A mere ten seconds later, every tile was down, and Angela and her father could breathe once more.

“We did it!” the excited six year old cried. “It worked! Just like when Timmy did it! Every tile!”

Patrick grinned, shaking his head. “Every tile! Angela Turner, you may be a domino genius! Wait until we tell Mummy!”

“Oh, poor Mummy. She didn’t get to see. Should we set them up for when she gets home from her class tonight?”

Patrick squinted his eyes as he shook his head with certainty. “No, not tonight, sweetie. In fact, we’d better get these cleaned up right now. It’s nearly bedtime.” Patrick knelt to begin the clean-up. Angela watched, her mouth screwed up in disinterest. “Come on, you,” her father ordered. “You promised, and I’ve got a lot to do before Mummy gets home and sees this disaster. So if you want to read a story tonight…”

Angela sighed heavily, but she knew he was right. If Mummy were to come home to this mess, she might start bringing her to class to be used as a model. “Alright. But its always more fun to make the mess than clean up.”

Half an hour later, the dominos were put away, chip wrappers cleaned up and dishes were washed.

“Not quite up to Mummy’s standards, but it’ll do,” Patrick said. “Now go get ready for bed while I finish up. And pick out a short story tonight. It’s late.”

“Daddy,” Angela pleaded. Her eyes were round as she looked up at her beloved playmate.

Out of necessity Patrick had built up some defenses against his daughter’s wiles. “Don’t even try the big eyes and pout with me, Miss. Short story or no story. Now, get!”

When Patrick came to the doorway of her room, Angela was still in front of her bookshelf, an intent expression that called to mind his wife.“I can’t decide. We’ve read all the storybooks.”

Pushing off from the doorjamb, Patrick asked, “How about we read another chapter from “The Wind in the Willows?” He picked up the tattered copy. Tim had loved that one as a young boy.

“No, not in the mood.” She twisted her hips, making her pink nightie swing.

“So what are you in the mood for, then?”

Angela’s eyes lit up. “You tell me a story, Daddy. Tell me the misty road story.” She climbed up on her bed and slipped under the yellow butterfly quilt.

Patrick’s brows drew together in confusion. “The misty road story? How do you know that story?”

Angela rolled her eyes. “Mummy tells me that story all the time. It’s my favorite.” This time, her big eyes did their magic. “Please, Daddy, tell me the misty road story. You remember it, I know you do.”

Patrick rubbed his hand over his face and took a deep breath. “Yes, I remember it.” His face softened as the images of that long ago day came to mind.

“See, Daddy, you know it. Just tell me the parts you remember. I’ll fill in everything you forget.”

A laugh burst from his chest. “Oh, you will, will you? Alright, then, scoot over. Make room.”

He sat his length along the bed and Angela snuggled her way under his arm, her head resting against his chest. “I’m ready.”

“Well, then, where does Mummy begin?”

“Mummy begins with Mummy’s story. About how she got sick and decided to change her life so she could be happy. You know, Daddy. I’m sure she’s told you. But you should tell me your story”

Patrick kissed her hair. “Yes, she’s told me. So I just tell you my story?”

“Yes. And don’t forget the part where Timmy was hanging out the car window.” Angela was not going to let any detail slip.

“Noted.” He paused, thinking of where to start. “Alright. Tim and I were in the car, driving to bring Mummy home from the-”

Angela sat up and looked her father in the eye. “Daddy, you have to start at the beginning. That’s nearly the end.”

Patrick’s eyebrows came down in confusion. “I’m not sure how to do this, sweetheart.”

“Daddy, it’s easy. Just think for minute. I can wait.”

Patrick considered. He’d never really told this story to another person. In the beginning, when he had to share the change in his life to family and friends, he kept to the basic facts. The details of the story were too precious to broadcast to the world. But this wasn’t the world he would share his tale with, this was his daughter, who apparently already knew more than he thought.

He glanced around the room, hoping to either find inspiration, or to delay long enough for Angela to fall asleep. Truth to tell, he was a little uncomfortable sharing these emotions aloud. His eyes fell upon the stack of Angela’s favorite fairy tales, and he smiled as an idea started to form in his head. He wondered if Angela would let him get away with this.

“Once upon a time-” he began.

“In a kingdom called Poplar,” Angela chimed in.

“Angel Girl, who is supposed to be telling this story?”

“Sorry, Daddy,” Angela replied, stifling a yawn.

“Well then,” Patrick continued,

Once upon a time, in a land called Poplar, there lived a man and his son. The man was a special guard for the kingdom. It was his job to protect the people from enchantments.

Oh, evil enchantments!”

“No, not evil enchantments,” Patrick contradicted. “Just…sad.”

He would cross the kingdom each day, giving out potions that would help to bring gladness to the land.

This was a very difficult job, but the King’s Guard was fortunate that there were others to help. In a hidden corner of the kingdom, there lived a family of Fairies. These Fairies were kind and good and beautiful, and they would fly from home to home offering peace and compassion to all those who needed it.

“Did they have wings?” Angela asked.

“Yes. Pretty wings, like a butterfly. They wore blue dresses and had wings of pink and gold.”

“I think I know who the fairies are. Daddy.”

“Well, don’t spoil it for me. May I continue, Miss?

The Guard was very grateful for their help, because each day, the sadness seemed to spread through the kingdom. Each day he saw sickness and pain and wondered if the enchantments would one day take over the entire land. Each day the Guard grew sadder and sadder.

Little did the Guard know, but a sad enchantment was taking hold of him. First, he lost the ability to laugh, and soon he could not smile. The kingdom became darker and greyer. One day, the Guard noticed something strange. Instead of his ordinary robes, he was wearing a suit of armour.

He tried to remove the armour, it would not release. The enchantment was complete.

For a long time, the Guard continued his duties, and felt grateful for the armour. No longer did the sadness of the land touch him. He was safe from the gloom.

But the Guard had a son, a young boy who loved to laugh and play. The boy watched his father lock himself away in his suit of armour, and the boy grew sad, too.

The Fairies saw this, and they worried. The Guard would disappear behind the armour one day they feared, and the gloom would rule the land. The fairies conferred about their fears, but could not solve the problem.

There was one fairy that watched most closely. The smallest of the Fairies, she was gentle and lovely and kindest of them all. She watched the Guard and set out to help.

The littlest Fairy began to follow the Guard on his visits. Together, they worked to ease the suffering they saw. Over time, they grew to be friends.

The Guard began to notice how very heavy his armour was. It grew more and more difficult to lift his arms to hold his son, or to help an old woman or do a kindness. Worst of all, the Guard realized that while the armour could keep the sadness from the world out, it was no protection from the pain in his own heart.

The Guard had grown to love the Littlest Fairy, and knew the armour would keep her away from him. Time passed, and the Guard continued to help the kingdom, and was grateful just to be near the Littlest Fairy.  Then one day, when he was busy helping another, an enchantment took the littlest Fairy away.

“Oh, Daddy, this is sad.”

“Yes, it is sad. But let’s wait for the ending to see.”

The Guard was beside himself with worry. As he travelled about the kingdom, he called for her, but had no response. If the littlest Fairy wanted him to save her, she would answer. His armour grew heavier He went home to find his son waiting for him.

“Father,” the boy called. “I’ve heard the littlest Fairy calling. I know where she is.”

“My boy, the Fairy does not want us to find her. I have frightened her with my suit of armour.”

But the boy was determined. “Father, you must listen again.”

The Guard closed his eyes and listened with all his heart. He stopped listening to the creaks and groans of the armour, to the sounds of others seeking his aid. He listened only for the littlest Fairy.

Slowly, he could hear the littlest Fairy calling his name, and his armour was pierced.

The Guard and his boy climbed upon the horse and rode for days to the farthest reaches of the kingdom, through the misty fields and forests, as her voice grew stronger. The boy stood behind his father, urging him on, shouting for her, when suddenly, the mist cleared, and standing before them was the littlest Fairy.

The Guard jumped down from his horse and stumbled towards her. With each step he grew more sure, as pieces of his armour fell to the ground, until finally, the Guard stood before the littlest fairy.

The littlest fairy nodded. “There. We’ve made a start.”

The end.

“I knew Mummy was the little Fairy, Daddy, “ Angela assured him as she tried to stifle a yawn.

“Yes, you’re very smart, Angel Girl.” He shifted from the bed and reached over her to tuck her in. “Did you like my story? Enough mist for you?” He bent to press a kiss to her forehead as he pulled the covers up tight.

“Yes.” the little girl rolled to her side, settling in with her cuddly. Sighing, she said as she drifted off, “I think Mummy liked it, too.”

Surprised, Patrick looked up and saw his wife in the doorway. “Shelagh. How long have you been there?”

Shelagh smiled and wrapped her arms around his waist. “From the very start, dearest.”

Writing Her Own Rules

Chapter One

With a click, the front door closed, shutting out the noise and commotion that started each day at the Turner household. No matter how hard she tried, Shelagh was unable to avert the frenetic bedlam that seemed to set Patrick and Timothy on their day. A forgotten lunch or a misplaced stethoscope, every morning there was something else to create chaos. Taking a deep breath, Shelagh pushed off from the door and returned to the kitchen, intent on a fresh cup of tea.

“Well, that’s sorted, Angel Girl,” she told her daughter. “Getting those two out of the house every morning is like moving Montgomery’s army!”

Angela giggled back and raised her arms up in the air, eager to be released from her high chair and taken into her mother’s arms. Shelagh smiled and happily complied.

It was their little ritual. No matter how cranky or tired or silly or happy Angela was, the moment she was in her mother’s arms, her body relaxed, her head nuzzling into the crook of Shelagh’s neck. The two would stay that way, unaware of the world around them, content to be together. Shelagh smoothed her hand over her baby’s velvety head and bent to place a kiss on her forehead. “Sweet girl.” Her eyes closed as she breathed in the sweet smell of baby and formula and clean cotton.

The moment never lasted forever, however, and turning on a dime, Angela’s head was up and she was reaching for the floor.

“Oh, no, wee beastie,” Shelagh laughed. “Once I put you down there’ll be no stopping you.” She grasped the little hand and danced the laughing baby out of the kitchen. “We have errands to get done today if we’re to have tea with Sister Julienne later! It’s off to the cleaners and the Post Office and the butcher’s all before your nap time, so we’d best get started!”

Shelagh took a last glance at the kitchen. “Oh, well. I’ll have to do the washing later while you nap. So much for that fresh cup of tea for me!”

A few hours later, the Turner women had made short work of the to-do list and were heading home for elevenses and a nap. Shelagh pushed the pram, deftly navigating the cobbles as Angela waved to every passerby.

“Quite the little princess, aren’t you, dearest?” Shelagh teased. “It’s no wonder, really, the way your father carries you about. That man will spoil you, Angela!” The scold had little power, though, as Shelagh stopped for a moment to retrieve a toy from her purse. Watching her daughter for a moment, Shelagh was interrupted by a shy voice.

“Mrs. Turner?”

Shelagh looked up and saw a woman, large with child, looking at her with recognition in her eyes. A sudden memory of a birth, fraught with worry for a large baby, came to her and she responded, “Louisa March! Oh, it’s been a long time! How are you, my dear?” Oddly, Shelagh’s voice changed a bit, somehow becoming a bit more assertive.

“I’m well, thank you, Sis-” she stopped suddenly, embarrassed by her mistake. “Sorry, Mrs. Turner. No offense.”

Shelagh smiled warmly. There had been a time when such an error would fluster her, a time when she was still so uncertain about her new self that any reminder of her previous life would upset her. More than a year and a half had passed since her decision to leave the Order of St. Raymond Nonnatus and marry Patrick, time spent learning her new path. She had no blueprint to follow and had, with Patrick’s help, created her own plan. Now she was confident in her choices, a happy wife and mother. Sister Bernadette was part of her identity, a part she did not want to forget.

“None taken, dear. It took me a bit of getting used to, as well.” A movement behind the other woman caught her eye. “And who is this? Could this be baby, oh, what was it? Edward?”

The little boy stepped forward. “I’m not a baby. That’s the baby!” He pointed to his mother’s belly.

The women laughed. “Sorry about that, young sir,” Shelagh returned. “You’re absolutely right. You are most definitely not a baby.”

Drawing courage from her friendly voice, the boy stepped out from behind his mother. “Eddie,” Louisa March told him, “this lady helped me to get you out of me tummy. Like I was tellin’ ya with the new baby. Sis-Mrs. Turner was a wonderful midwife. She knew just what to do when you got stuck and needed some coaxing out.”

The boy considered this for a moment, then asked, “Will you help Mummy with the new baby, too?”

“No, I’m afraid I can’t. But I’m sure whomever helps your mother will take excellent care of her.”

“But why not? If you did me, you should do the new baby, too.”

“Eddie,” his mother scolded.

“No, that’s alright,” Shelagh assured her. “I can’t come and help your mother because I have my own baby to take care of now.”

The boy stopped to consider this. “So you can’t have your own baby and take care of ladies like me mum, then?”

Shelagh paused. How had this small boy found just the right question to ask? She took a small breath and demurred, “Well, we can’t do everything, can we?” She moved back to the pram’s handle. “Well, good luck, Louisa. I’m sure it will all go splendidly. And congratulations to you, too, Eddie. I’m quite sure you’ll be an excellent big brother.”

She pushed the pram to start home and met some resistance. The front wheel had caught in a rut, and she sighed, exasperated. After struggling over the street for nearly a block, Shelagh muttered, “Cobbles. Clearly the architect that designed these streets was a man. Of course he was. How on earth could a woman possibly be an architect?” Her voice had a sharp edge to it. “Don’t mind me, Angela. I’m just-oh, never mind.”

Wisely, Angela stuck her thumb in her mouth and settled to enjoy the bouncy ride.

Next Chapter

Writing Her Own Rules, Chapter Two

Previous Chapter

Two hours later, Angela was fed, bathed (there had been some disagreement over the necessity of pureed spinach for lunch) and asleep in her cot. Shelagh returned to the kitchen and faced the damage caused by feeding her family two meals. Resignedly, she pulled her apron back over her head and set to work to restore it to its preferred state.

“I used to love the kitchen, really I did,” Shelagh brooded. “Everything had its place, and I could try new recipes, I could bake to my heart’s content. Now if-Oh, really, Shelagh, you’re being ridiculous. Go put the radio on and get to work.”

The smell of the soap bubbles and the hot water in the sink helped to relax her somewhat, and Shelagh started to laugh. “Oh, what have I come to when dish soap and hot water can make me feel better?”

She shook her head and put herself to work. A clean kitchen and a cup of tea and everything would be better. There was her appointment with Sister Julienne to look forward to later at Nonnatus House, and tonight she and Patrick would watch a new episode of Television Playhouse on the telly. A nice quiet day.

The phone rang out shrilly through the flat.

“Oh!” Shelagh muttered. That infernal thing was sure to wake Angela, and a nap cut short never made for an easy afternoon.

“Hello, Turner residence,” she said sharply into the phone.

“Shelagh, I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t call during nap time, but I’ve been called out and won’t be able to call later. It’s Mr. Lightman, and it looks like the cancer’s going to take him tonight. I’ll have to stay with him; I most likely won’t be home until late.”

Shelagh held in her disappointment. Patrick’s had been called out three nights in a row this week. She had been looking forward to some time alone with her husband. But, she knew it couldn’t be helped. If Patrick had been less devoted to his calling, she probably never would have fallen in love with him in the first place. The least she could do was to make things easier for him. “Of course, Patrick. Is there anything you’d like me to do?”

“Yes. I know it’s a bother, but could you ask Sister Winifred to bring the morphine supplies from my surgery? I’m sure I don’t have enough in my bag.”

She nodded, even though he couldn’t see her through the phone line. “Alright, Patrick. I’ll call ‘round Nonnatus now.”

“Thanks, Shelagh. Oh, and Shelagh, I’ve left my overcoat at the clinic. Could you pick that up for me and bring it to the cleaners? I spilled a cup of coffee down the front this morning.”

“Yes, Patrick.” Never mind that she had already gone to the cleaners today. Patrick had a lot on his mind, she reminded herself.

“Sweetheart, I don’t know what I’d do without you. I’ve got to go. See you tonight.” And with that, he signed off.

Sighing, Shelagh allowed herself to feel a moment of frustration. The cleaners shop was blocks away from both Nonnatus House and the surgery. She’d have to rush out soon in order to make her meeting with Sister Julienne in time.

“Well, it’s a good thing you’re up, anyway,” she informed her daughter, crying down the hall in her cot.

Sister Winifred was already waiting for Shelagh outside the surgery when Shelagh pushed the pram up to the stairs.

“Hello, Mrs. Turner,” the young nun waved cheerfully. Her wide smile turned to a surprised frown when she saw Angela’s tear-stained cheeks. “Oh, and what on earth could be making you look so blue, little one?”

“I’m afraid we’re a bit out of sorts this afternoon, Sister.” Shelagh lifted the unhappy baby from the pram to carry her inside. “We haven’t had much of a nap, and I think there may be a new tooth coming through.”

“A new tooth!” Sister Winifred cooed happily. “How lovely!”

“Yes, quite.” Shelagh pressed her lips together. The nun’s enthusiasm was not something she was prepared to humor this afternoon. She watched as Sister Winifred tried to distract Angela from her discomfort and felt a pang of guilt. Was there no one safe from her own bad mood today?

“Sister, would you mind taking Angela for a moment? I can fetch the supplies for you more quickly if you just follow me in.”

“Of course. Here we go, Miss Angela. Do you know, I knew a kitten named Angela once,” she prattled on as Angela reached for her mother. The nun pranced along behind Shelagh, trying to help change the mood. “Oh, Angela was the sweetest puss I ever knew. That is until I met you, of course.”

Shelagh went to the top left drawer in Patrick’s desk and took out a biscuit from his secret stash. Shaking her head, she “You’re lucky this isn’t empty, Patrick Turner.” She turned and offered the biscuit to her daughter.

A moment later, the room was quiet as Angela gnawed wetly on her treat.

“Well, that’s done it!” cheered Sister Winifred. “I suppose you know all sorts of tricks to keep her happy, Mrs. Turner.”

Shelagh sighed. “You do what you must to survive,” she joked. She turned and went to the supply locker.

Nervous that Angela would start up again if she lost sight of her mother, Sister Winifred followed.

“You’re so very efficient, Mrs. Turner. The nurses all go on about how you were the backbone of the midwifery practice. Just yesterday, Trixie was telling us of a thrilling birth she attended with you where you used Eve’s Rocking to save the baby.” She turned her face back to Angela’s. “You know exactly how to take care of everyone. It’s no wonder you have such a happy family.”

Shelagh stopped for a moment. “Why, thank you Sister. Though I’m not so certain I am that efficient. I’m two days behind on the washing, and the kitchen floor hasn’t been the same since my little Angel decided she wanted jam for lunch last week.”

“Oh, well, those things will sort themselves out, won’t they? The important thing is how much you’re able to do for your family.” If Sister Winifred had seen Shelagh’s face at that moment, she might not have been so certain.

Reaching for the morphine, Shelagh stopped for a moment, her forehead creasing over her nose. Pressing her lips together, she thought of all the things she had done for her family just today. She always seemed to be doing something for someone. She turned back, a box of the needed medication in her hand.

“Dr. Turner didn’t say how much he thought he’d need, but given the circumstances, I think it would be best if you took at least a half dozen ampules. That, combined with what he already has, should be enough.” She passed a clipboard to Sister Winifred. “If you’ll sign here, please, for the records.”

Suddenly reminded of her official role, Sister Winifred’s eyes widened. “Of course. If you…if you would,” she stumbled a bit for words.

Shelagh reached out and took Angela, complete with hands a bit gooey with wet biscuit, back in her arms.

(A/N: Regarding the morphine: Have I sent too much, or not enough? Oh well, good thing it’s fiction!)

Next Chapter

An Unexpected Benefit

Quiet came over the flat suddenly, as it did each night. Baths and homework, all the final preparations for the coming day created a such a flurry each night that Shelagh thought would the family would never settle. Then she would turn around and Timothy would be in bed reading, Angela asleep in her cot, and Patrick would be settled in his chair reading.

Once the quiet came, Shelagh slid into her own routine. Lunches were made, laundry sorted for the next day, and baby bottles were sterilized. By nearly nine, she was finally finished.

Patrick came into the kitchen. “You’re always so busy in here in the evenings now. Come sit with me.” He held out a hand to her.

“I will, Patrick, just one more thing. Let me get a bottle ready for Angela’s two a.m. feeding, and then I’ll join you.”

Patrick leant against the door jamb and watched her as she reached up to the cupboard for the formula.

“You don’t have to watch me, Patrick,” Shelagh told him.

His eyes laughed as his eyebrows twitched. “Maybe I like watching you,” he teased.

She glanced back, rolling her eyes. She reached from the collection of perfectly sterilized and stacked bottles. She always hated this part. It was rather like finishing the washing and having to use something right away. Measuring the powder, she grew a bit self-conscious.

“Patrick, stop. You’re making me nervous.”

Pushing off against the door frame, he  moved beside her.

“I know what you’re thinking, Shelagh. Don’t.”

Shelagh shook her head. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Patrick reached around and took the formula can from her hands. “This can wait.” He slid his hands up her arms and looked down into her eyes. “What you feed Angela doesn’t make a difference. Shelagh, you could feed that child Horlicks and she’d thrive. In fact, I think Sister Monica Joan would prefer it.”

Shelagh wouldn’t meet his eyes. “I know, Patrick, it’s just that sometimes I feel like I’m letting her down. I want to give her everything.”

“I know,” he said softly. “But you can’t give her everything. No parent can. I can’t give Timothy everything he needs, even though he’s my biological son. But we can give our little girl all we have.” He pulled her close. “And you give her so much, sweetheart. Angela is the sweet, lovely baby she is because of you. Not breast milk, not genetics, Shelagh. You.”

Finally, she was able to meet his eyes. “I suppose you’re right, Patrick.” She stepped closer into his arms. “You always make me feel better.”
“Do I?” he asked, his voice deepening. He lifted her hand to his lips, his eyes teasing. “Then I suppose you’d better make it up to me.”

The unfinished bottle forgotten, Patrick led his wife to their bedroom.

Some time later, deep in the dark, quiet night, Angela’s cries came through the flat. Shelagh groaned and lifted her head from Patrick’s chest. “Patrick?” she whispered.

“Hmmm?” came the muffled reply.

“Do you know what the best part about bottle feeding is?”

Patrick groaned. He had been out-manuevered.

Shelagh turned to her side, wrapping the blankets tightly around herself. “You get to to take the midnight feedings sometimes, dearest!”

My Little Yellowbird

tumblr_nib2uu829A1sjv7x9o1_1280

Photo credit: Messer-Turner-Bates (look at her great work on Tumblr!)

(Go ahead and yell at me. I realize how self-serving this is. Grandma made me do it.)

The Poplar Community Center hummed with activity as nurses and nuns transformed it into it’s Tuesday purpose: Mother and Baby Clinic.  Angela Turner was in her usual place, right in the middle of things, just the way she liked it. Her pram, in its place next to the in-take desk, gave her a clear view of all the activity in the room while allowing her to keep her eye on her mother at all times.

“It’s quite sweet, really,” Sister Winifred said. The young nun turned to Shelagh Turner, busy organizing the patient files into proper order. “I can tell exactly where you are, just by watching her eyes!”

Shelagh laughed, and stepped over to her daughter’s side. “We always know where the other is, don’t we, Angel Girl?” She ran her hand gently over the silky hair. “We keep an eye out for each other.”

A loud rumbling came from the entrance, and the doors to the community room burst open.

“That Fred Buckle had better make sure he steers clear of me for the rest of the week, that’s all I have to say,” huffed Sister Evangelina, her arms swinging briskly back and forth as she made her way into the room.

“Yes, Sister,” appeased Sister Julienne. “But even you must concede that Fred certainly had little to do with the state of the roads.”

“That’s as may be, but he is responsible for the state of my tires. My bones will never forgive him for the shake up I’ve suffered today.” Despite her words, the crotchety nun’s mood was softening. “Angela Turner!” she cooed, walking gingerly over to the pram. “Mrs. Turner, you’ve brought exactly the right cure for my lumbago!”

Reaching for the smiling infant, she was interrupted.

“I’m sorry, Sister. But I’m afraid I must pull rank.” Sister Julienne, usually the epitome of harmony and peace, edged in front of Sister Evangelina. Her reward for such surprisingly rude behavior  was a delighted giggle as Angela turned and reached for her favorite person outside of the family.

“Yes, Angel Girl,” Sister Julienne murmured. Lifting the clinic’s darling up from her pram, the nun held her in a close cuddle. Angela laughed again, her little hand patting at the starched white cloth covering the Sister’s head.

Shelagh chuckled, “You’ll spoil her, Sister. You shouldn’t let her manhandle your wimple.”

“That’s not possible, Shelagh. You can never spoil a child with love.” Angela’s attention turned to the long cord holding the nun’s plain wooden cross. “Do you like my cross, little girl?”

Angela gurgled, tugging at the cord.

“And look at you, so pretty in your yellow dress. You know, Shelagh, I think I like her best in yellow. With those lovely big eyes, it suits her perfectly.”

Angela laughed again, her arms bouncing with delight. “You like yellow, too, my dear? Well, why wouldn’t you? Yes, yes, my dear, flap your little wings. Flap them, yes, there you go.” Sister Julienne laughed, not caring if she looked the least bit silly.

Shelagh smiled proudly as she watched the two play. Angela was such a happy baby, and never more than when she was the certain of someone’s attention.

Sister Evangelina, however, had had enough. “Really, Sister. You can’t spoil a child with love, but you can certainly monopolize her. How on earth is the poor little thing ever going to get to know anyone else with you around?”

An expression that can only be referred to as slightly smug crossed Sister Julienne’s features. “I am so very sorry, Sister. I know it must seem so to you, but how can I possibly be held responsible if the child prefers me?” Sister Evangelina now forgotten, she continued, “Yes, little one, flap your arms. Aren’t you just the prettiest little bird? Aren’t you just the prettiest little yellow bird?”

Back On Their Feet

Inspired by this pic, posted by dome-of-silence on her Tumblr blog.

tumblr_n17akmpiAj1qc9wpbo1_1280

Source: Dome-of-silence.tumblr.com

It was a clumsy embrace, the family clinging together in their moment of pure joy. Each had such high hopes for this moment, such fears that it might not come to be. Hours of exercises, hard work, and prayer had all centered on the moment Timothy could someday step forward on his own, the despised calipers left behind.

Of course Dad was late. Timothy knew not to expect his father to be on time; rounds could not be cancelled that day. Still, the empty seat left beside Mum spoke of her wish that his father would be there.

Timothy was glad Dad didn’t arrive on time. His father would insist on taking off the calipers himself, and Timothy worried that the sight of his father at his feet at just that moment would be too upsetting. He wasn’t a little boy any more. He would have to gather all his courage to do this. Dad didn’t have to see his attempts. Timothy wanted his father to see his success.

Mum would do it efficiently, her years of training as a nurse helping to keep the moment light. She would remove the polished leather and metal matter-of-factly, a supportive smile on her face. They understood one another, needed each other. Timothy knew how much she loved him, and felt lucky that she loved him by choice.

He stood on his weakened legs, supporting himself with his two canes. Step by step he struggled towards the carpet, his determination growing.

“You’re all right, dearest,” he heard his mother whisper, her voice completely certain. With a deep breath, he pushed off. He could feel the carpet tug against his shoe for a moment, and felt irritation rise in his throat. If he were to stumble because of some stupid green carpet…

But he didn’t stumble. He moved the cane forward and continued. With each step he could feel his confidence grow, his legs grow stronger. He looked up, smiling widely, and saw his father enter the hall. Yes, he thought. I can do it.

He dropped a cane and felt his back strengthen. Blood pumped in his ears as he took another step, never noticing the second cane fall away. It felt as if he was running, his heart pounding with pride as he made to meet his father.

Then somehow they were in a huddle, the three of them, stunned, and happy, and together.

“I did it, Dad,” he exclaimed.

“Well done, son,” came his choked reply.

Timothy heard the relief in his father’s voice and his mother’s laugh. His arms clutched at them, overwhelmed for just a moment, and together, Patrick and Shelagh helped their son get back to his feet. Patrick kept his arm around to offer support, but Timothy smiled up at him confidently.

“I can do this, Dad. I can finish.”

Patrick nodded his head quickly, and reached his hand out to his wife. Shelagh moved closer to take it, and the two followed their son back down the carpet.

“Well done, young man,” the cheerful nurse applauded. “That was quick work!”

Timothy grinned. “Yes, ma’am. That’s the way we do things in this family. Once we Turners put our minds to something, it’s done.”

The room broke out in laughter, and Patrick ran his head over his son’s hair. Timothy welcomed the affectionate gesture and grinned wider. He could see tears glistening in Dad’s eyes, his face beaming.

“Well done, son,” Patrick repeated. He ran his hand through his hair, and started to laugh. He turned to his wife, and shook his head. “Shelagh,” he breathed, dazed. Suddenly he reached out, taking her face in his hands, and kissed her.

Now, if poor Timothy Turner had not had such an astonishing day, he might have been embarrassed. He certainly would have complained loudly. And without a doubt he would have berated his father for such an awkward public display of affection.

As it was, when Patrick Turner finally released his startled wife from his kiss, all his son could say was,

“Well done, Dad.”

The Heart Wants What the Heart wants

My inspiration is from the trailer and some press-kit talk about a subject Call the Midwife will deal with this season. I’ve used a snippet of Peter Noakes dealing with a case concerning homosexuality, and built on that. In this story, Patrick was somehow involved in the reporting of the case.

***   ***

The scratch of the phonograph player drew Shelagh’s attention away from her novel and she glanced over at her husband. Lost in his thoughts, he hadn’t noticed the music had ended. With a curious look, she closed her book and got up to turn the player off, then moved and placed her hand on his shoulder.

Alerted by her gentle touch, he looked up at her.

“Everything all right, Patrick? You look very serious.”

He took a deep breath and nodded. “Yes. Everything’s fine. I was just thinking.” He took her hand in his and placed a kiss on her fingers.

Smiling in response, Shelagh teased, “Well, then. That’s where the trouble begins!” With a caress of his cheek she sat down next to him on the sofa.

“Doesn’t it just?” Patrick lifted his arm to draw her in closer. They sat together in companionable silence, their fingers playing together.

Shelagh knew enough to be patient. There was clearly something Patrick needed to ponder through, and pushing too hard would lead to nothing. She knew he was thinking, and he knew she knew. Soon enough he would open up.

“Shall I make some tea?” she asked.

With another deep breath, he answered. “No, thanks. No tea. Just sit with me.” His thumb began to rub at his forefinger, a sure sign that Patrick was ready to speak.

“That case today? With Sergeant Noakes?” He paused, and Shelagh turned her eyes towards him. He released a breath and continued. “We didn’t make mention of the man’s …homosexuality… in the documents we had to file regarding the accident. We didn’t exactly falsify the record, we just…kept that part out.”

“Oh,” came her reply. “Will that be a problem? I mean, if it comes out in court that you hid-”

“Likely not. We were able to find a way to present the information without making reference to it.” He turned to face her. “If we hadn’t, he would have gone to prison, most certainly. Are you disappointed?”

“Disappointed? Why on earth would I be disappointed?”

He fidgeted in his seat. “The Church hasn’t had a particularly…understanding point of view on the subject.”

Shelagh sat up straight. “Patrick Turner, the Church is run by humans, and humans haven’t always been as compassionate towards one another as we should. I should hope that the Church will realize this one day and make amends.”

Patrick stared at his wife for a long moment, then laughed quietly. “The women of Nonnatus always surprise me. Such deep faith, yet so understanding,” he admitted.

“Good,” Shelagh retorted. She turned to nestle in again. “I like to keep you on your toes. Besides, Patrick, I should know better than anyone that you can’t help where you love. The heart wants what the heart wants.”

“Yes, love,” he responded, and proceeded to show her exactly what his heart wanted.

Timothy’s Kaleidoscope

The front door slammed as Timothy rushed in after school.

“Sorry, Mum. The wind took the door,” he whispered from the hallway. He tiptoed through the hall and peered around the sitting room door to see his new baby sister cuddled in his father’s arms. “Did I wake her?”

“No, good thing for you. She’s been awake and talking for my whole visit,” Patrick spoke in a sing-song voice.

“Why are you home now, anyway?” Timothy asked. “Don’t you have calls today? It’s Monday.” Timothy began to rummage through the pantry, in search of food. “Where’s Mum?” he asked through a mouthful of biscuits.

“Here I am,” Shelagh answered, coming down the hall with yet another basket of laundry. “I thought I’d take advantage of your dad’s drop-in to get ahead of this.” She held out the basket filled with the smocked cotton dresses that dominated Angela’s wardrobe.

“You should be resting, sweetheart,” Patrick admonished. “You’re not getting enough sleep.That last thing we need is for you to get ill.”

“Oh, pish. I can get by on just a little sleep as you, Patrick Turner. Less, probably. Timmy, what would you like for a snack? Dinner will be a bit later than usual, I’m afraid. Angela’s bottles are sterilizing, so I’ll have to wait to use the stove.”

“I’m fine. Just stopping, I’m on my way out, anyway. I’ll be back in time for dinner.”

“Oh,” Shelagh answered, “I suppose that’s fine.”

“Hold on, young man, what about your schoolwork?” Patrick looked up from the game of peek-a-boo.

“Don’t worry, Dad. I stayed in during recess to do some. And Mr. Feeney let me work on my theme while the rest of the class was still finishing maths. He said since I probably wasn’t getting any sleep at night, he should give me a hand and let me get work done at school.” He bounced Angela’s foot in his hand. “He never lets pupils do that, so that’s something Angela’s good for,” he finished, a smirk gracing his face.

“I’m sure your sister’s thrilled to hear that she gets you out of work, son. Don’t be late.” Angela’s coo redirected his attention back to her and Patrick resumed their game.

The door slammed shut behind him, and Shelagh put the laundry down.

“Patrick,” she asked, in the way she had that made a statement a question, “Timothy’s gone out after school every day this week. And he goes right up to his room after dinner.”

Patrick looked up. Shelagh was gripping her hands, and the crease on her forehead was starting to show, but he had no idea what could be bothering her. “And?” he asked.

“He doesn’t seem to want to spend any time with us. Doesn’t that seem strange to you?” The crease was getting deeper.

Patrick stood and placed the baby in her moses basket. “Shelagh, he’s about to turn twelve. It would be strange if he did want to spend time with his parents.” Even so, he pulled her into his arms.

Shelagh nestled her head under his chin. “I know, it’s just that…well, he used to sit with me after school, and tell me about his day, or what ridiculous thing happened on the way home. Every day. Until…”

Patrick tilted his head to better see her face. “Until?”

Shelagh sighed. “Well, until Angela came home. Do you think, perhaps…could he be jealous?” She looked up into her husband’s eyes. “Before, I was able to give him all of my attention, and now, I never seem to have any time for him. Even dinner will have to be late tonight because of Angela’s needs.” She hid her face in his chest. “Do you think he feels as if I don’t love him anymore?”

Patrick laughed softly. “Shelagh, love, that is most definitely not how he feels. Timothy knows how much you love him. And he is thrilled about Angela, too.”

“I know you think I worry too much, Patrick, but it doesn’t feel right to me. Something’s different.”

His arms tightened around her and he rubbed his chin against her hair. “All right, my love. I’ll keep an eye out, but I think you’re barking up the wrong tree. It’s more likely that we have a much bigger problem on our hands.”

Shelagh looked up, alarmed.

Patrick kissed her “worry crease.” “I’m afraid Timothy is starting to show signs of…adolescence!”

 


The next morning was a particular rush. Both Patrick and Timothy needed to leave early, and Angela’s nocturnal fussing put them all on edge. Timothy rushed about, packing his school bag.

“Mum, where’s my gym kit? You promised to wash it. The hockey tournament begins today. I have to have it!”

Shelagh grimaced. “I’m sure I washed it, Timothy. Did you look in the pile of laundry I left for you to put away yesterday?”

“Yes. It is definitely not there. Mr. Pigeon said no one can play without it.”

Patrick came around the corner, the half-finished basket of Angela’s dresses and soiled clothes in his arms. “It’s in here, Tim. You can just wear it today, and Mum will wash it this weekend. Problem solved.” The days of being a single father had given Patrick a laissez-faire attitude towards the wearability of soiled clothes.

Timothy growled and took the offending gym kit from his father, stuffing them into his bag.

“I’m sorry, Timothy, dear. I must have forgotten all about it. I promise to clean them first thing when you get home today.” Shelagh gave him a weak smile.

Timothy shook his head. “I’m not coming home after school, didn’t I tell you? I have to go to… the library. There’s a new project coming up. I’ll be home for dinner.”

“Oh, alright, then. And I’m sorry about your clothes.”

“S’alright. Gotta run.” Timothy made for the door.

“Timothy,” his father called him back. “Say goodbye to your mother.”

“Bye!” his son shouted back and let the front door slam behind him.

Quiet descended over the little kitchen. “I really must take a look at that door,” Patrick joked, trying to lighten the mood. “That boy will knock it off its hinges one of these days.”

Shelagh turned away to the sink.

“Shelagh, you’re thinking too hard about this. He’s just being a boy. There’s no need to worry.”

She shook her head, but her answer was cut off by the baby’s cries.

 


By the end of the week, even Patrick was starting to think there was something amiss. He and Shelagh agreed that for dinner that night, he would take Timothy to Capriani’s Cafe for a Friday night fry-up, just the boys. It was time for a talk.

As he had all week, Tim ran out right after school, and with the dinner hour fast approaching, still had not returned home. Patrick and Shelagh grew anxious. Patrick sat with the baby, her bottle almost finished, and said, “He’s just lost track of time. It’s all right, Shelagh.” His words showed little of his growing anger, however. Shelagh was miserable, and Tim would have a much sterner talking-to than Patrick had originally planned.

The front door slammed again, followed by the sound of Timothy’s feet bounding to his room. Patrick stood angrily and handed the baby off to Shelagh. “That’s it. We’ll have it out here and now.”

“Patrick, don’t be angry with him. It’s my fault. I haven’t been able to pay enough attention to him. If we just explain to him that we’d like to know more about his whereabouts…”

“No, Shelagh. This is about him being selfish. He has to learn he’s not always going to be the center of attention.” With Angela in her arms, Shelagh followed as Patrick strode towards his son’s room. A knock at the front door stopped them in their tracks. Throwing a frustrated glance up the steps, he opened it to reveal Sister Julienne.

“Sister!”

“Hello, Dr. Turner, Shelagh. Please forgive my intrusion so close to dinner.”

Shelagh stepped up, “Sister, come in, please.”

“No, thank you, Shelagh. I can only stop for a moment. I just wanted to help Timothy with his parcels.” Smiling, the nun held out a square box. “He’ll need this for his project.”

Stunned, Patrick asked, “His project?”

“Yes, well, it was to be a surprise, but we were forced to take a rather long way round. The construction work on the Chrisp Street Market has closed several of the quicker routes to Stepney from Nonnatus House, I’m afraid. Timothy had hoped to get this home before you returned from your calls, which is why he ran on ahead with the ‘bones’ of the project.”

“Sister, we had no idea Timothy was bothering you. I’m so very sorry-” Patrick apologized.

“He was no bother, I was delighted to help. You have a very lovely young man, both of you. You should be very proud. And now, I’m afraid, I must continue my journey. Mrs. Flint’s incision is causing her considerable pain, and as Mrs. B has left a cold repast this evening, I thought to get the visit in sooner rather than later. Enjoy your evening,” she farewelled and climbed back on her bicycle.

Stunned, Patrick and Shelagh watched as the nun made her way back into the streets of Poplar. They turned to each other, then looked down the hall.

“I think I may have jumped to conclusions,” Patrick admitted. He followed his wife back into the flat.

“I think perhaps we both have,” Shelagh agreed. Together they followed after their son. Surprised to see his bedroom empty, a sound from their own bedroom guided them to him and Patrick pushed the door open. Timothy stood over Angela’s cot at the foot of their bed, attaching some sort of mechanism above it.

“Tim,” his father called.

Timothy dropped his arms, and looked across the room at his parents. He let out a deep sigh of resignation. “It was supposed to be a surprise, but the stupid roadwork made me late.” He stepped over and took the box from Patrick. “You may as well open the box. It’s spoiled, now.”

Shelagh smiled. “No, Timothy. Patrick, leave the box. We’ll be in the sitting room.  Call us when you want us.” Patrick returned her smile, and grinned at his son. “After you, Mrs. Turner.” With his hand at her back, he escorted his wife and daughter out to the landing.

Closing the door behind him, he raised his hands to her face. “I think we’ll be fine.” Patrick lowered his head and kissed her gently, careful of the now sleeping baby in her arms. His fingers moved to her hair and caressed her just behind her ears. Shelagh pushed up on her tippy toes to kiss him back. Relief had made her giddy, and she was happy to show Patrick.

Sooner than they thought possible, Timothy interrupted them.

“Really? I ask for five minutes?” Tim complained, unable to hide his grin. “If you’re finished, you can come in now.”

Patrick and Shelagh stepped in to the room, their eyes drawn to the cot and they both gasped. Fluttering above was a cluster of butterflies, each one a kaleidoscope of color. Shelagh slowly made her way toward the flight of color, her eyes filled with wonder. “Oh, Timothy!” she whispered. “You made this?” She looked to her son. “It’s beautiful.” Her eyes gleamed with tears.

“Well done, son,” admired Patrick, who would later claim that the room had been dusty, and his eyes were reacting to the motes.

“I didn’t do it all by myself,” Tim told them and the story rushed out of him. “I had lots of help. It was Nurse Franklin’s idea at first. She knew how much you liked that butterfly I sent you when you were in sanatorium. Bagheera helped me make the dangly-frame thing, and Sister Julienne and I made the butterflies. See? They’re watercolor paper. We experimented with all sorts of designs. I liked this one. We dripped color on to the damp paper and let it all blend together, sort of. Then I cut out the shapes-Dad, that’s how I got that blister the other day-and today Nurse Noakes and Nurse Miller and Sister Winifred helped me tie them on. Sister Monica Joan helped by finding the fishing line we used-how does she know how to get fishing line, Mum?-and Sister Evangelina hid everything in her room. She said you’d never go in there, no matter what. She was right, wasn’t she? You had no idea?” Tim stopped to catch his breath.

His mother sighed quietly. “No, Timothy, dearest, I had absolutely no idea.”  She tapped a bright blue and purple butterfly, sending the whole flight in motion.

“You’ve been doing this all week?” Patrick asked.

Timothy nodded. “I started planning it last week, at Nurse Lee’s party, but I’ve been going to Nonnatus everyday this week. That’s why I was skipping recess, too.” He looked nervous. “Do you like it? The nurses all told me it’d be safe. Angela can’t get hurt by it. It’s really secure, Fred and I tested it out on Freddie’s cot.”

Shelagh placed the sleeping Angela into her cot, again gently tapping a butterfly. “It’s perfect,” she breathed. “Angela’s very lucky to have a brother like you. I’m afraid I have a confession to make,” Shelagh said, turning to face the young boy. “I thought you were staying away from the house because you were unhappy about the baby.”

Tim stared in amazement. “Unhappy? Angela’s brilliant! It’d be nice if she didn’t make so much noise at night, and sometimes she does smell pretty bad, but that stuff doesn’t last too long, and before you know it she’ll be a real person.”

“So you’re sure we’re paying enough attention to you? We’re not spending too much time with Angela?” Shelah wondered.

“Of course you are. She’s a baby, after all. She can’t do anything yet. Besides,” he winked, “before she came, I couldn’t get away with anything. Now, I have all sorts of plans.”

“What sort of plans?” his father asked suspiciously.

“Oh, nothing really-”

He was interrupted when Angela startled and let out a sharp cry, and in that moment, Timothy knew he was no longer an only child. An alliance had been forged that would be the only force capable of facing their parents.

The power had shifted.

The Paper Anniversary, Epilogue

Previous Chapter

For a week, Patrick was a cheerful non-smoker, perhaps even a bit smug. The family was amazed at his determination and positive attitude. He would pontificate largely on the wonders of his sharpened sense of smell and  taste, how he felt free from the tyranny of the cigarette.

“Since medical school, Tim. Over thirty years,” he reminded his son more than once. “I was a smoker for over thirty years. Kicked it straight off.”

Even a supportive son has his limits, though, and Timothy started spending a bit more time outside.

Shelagh was made of sterner stuff, and was happy to hear Patrick’s tales of conversion. His cough hadn’t stopped completely, but was improving enough to ease her worries.

However, the sense of triumph may have blinded her to what was to come.

The eighth day cigarette-free, Patrick seemed distracted. During clinic he was subjected to a stern lecture from Sister Evangelina on the merits of paying attention to a patient. On his calls, old Mr. Talbot had to remind him twice that it was his leg the good doctor was there to see, and not his ear.

By the time he arrived home for dinner, even later than usual, Patrick was a bit irritable.

The tenth day, Patrick woke late, forgot he was to make calls at the London Hospital, and picked a fight with Timothy about the length of his pants.

Shelagh reminded Timothy that the road ahead would be a bit rocky, and his father deserved their patience.

Even Angela was not immune to his irritation. After a week and a half of no cigarettes, Patrick became less understanding of the infant’s night time waking habits.

Through all this, Shelagh was the soul of patience. She had asked a great deal of him, the very least she could do was fulfill her promise to stand by his side.

So, how to help? Obviously, Patrick needed some distractions. She brought him some gum to chew. She encouraged walks. She thought of projects to keep him busy. Patrick would succeed, she was determined.

By the second Saturday, it seemed as if nothing would help. Home early from a slow day at the surgery, Patrick was tired, bored and cranky. And apparently, looking for a fight.

Shelagh knew better than to rise to the bait, but Timothy…Well, Timothy was a growing boy, after all, eager to prove himself a man.

After a lunch featuring sniping and passive-aggressive arguments, the poor woman had had enough. She dressed Angela in her warmest sweater, wrapped her in the favorite pink blanket and announced, “Timothy, it’s time for you to take your sister for a very long walk.”

Normally, Tim would balk at such a task on a Saturday afternoon, but the idea of spending the day working on his history theme as his father prowled about the flat was enough to make the boy jump at the chance to get out.

“Can I go to Nonnatus? See if anyone’s there?” he asked quietly.

“Yes. Here’s a bottle just in case. She’s changed and fed, so you should be fine for at least an hour.” Shelagh glanced back down the hall. “Yes. I’ll need at least an hour. Maybe two. Trust me, Tim. I have a plan.”

She returned to find Patrick still at the table, drumming his fingers on its surface. “Don’t start, Shelagh. He was just as difficult as-”

“Yes, dear,” Shelagh interrupted. “I know. You’re a wee bit out of sorts today.” She smiled brightly at him. “You just need a distraction, that’s all.”

Patrick’s head craned to the ceiling, his eyes rolling in disgust. “Shelagh, I am not fixing another squeaky hinge or helping you transpose another tenor part for the choir. If you think-”

“Shh. I know,” Shelagh stepped closer to him and cradled his cheek. She bent down and placed a warm kiss on his unresponsive lips.

“Shelagh,” he complained. “I will not be manipulated like this. If you think you can…what are you doing?”

“Nothing, Patrick. Certainly not manipulating you.” Her dress fell to the floor.

“Shelagh!”

“I promised I would help, Patrick. So I’m helping.” Placing one foot on the chair across from him, she unsnapped the suspenders to her left stocking and slid it down her leg. “Don’t you want my help, dearest?” she asked innocently.

For a long moment Patrick stared at his wife. Then he closed his eyes and let out a deep breath, releasing the bad mood with it. His hand reached over and glided up the length of her calf.

“So everytime I want a cigarette you’re going to seduce me?”

“Is there a problem with that?” Standing before him, Shelagh’s innocent smile became rather saucy.

“I don’t know,” he answered. He swiftly flicked the suspenders on the other leg and tossed the stocking on the floor with its mate. “I smoked for a very long time, Shelagh. I think I’m going to need a lot of distractions.”

Pulling him to his feet, Shelagh wrapped her arms around his neck to bring his face to hers. “Whatever it takes, Patrick. A girl has to do what a girl has to do.”

The Paper Anniversary , Chapter 7

Previous Chapter

Over the next week, the family saw little of  Patrick. The demands of his practice seemed quite high, and even Tuesday, his one night a week guaranteed to be off, he had to go to the London.  Shelagh was growing concerned that the plans for their first wedding anniversary would have to be postponed.

“Not a chance, sweetheart,” Patrick promised when she told him of her fears. He pulled her away from the sink and whispered in her ear, “I have every intention of celebrating our anniversary. I’m looking forward to unwrapping my present tomorrow night. After the children go to bed.”

“Patrick,” Shelagh flirted. “You’re very greedy. How do you know I’ve gotten you anything at all?”

Nuzzling her neck, her answered, “Hmm, I’ve got my present right here in my arms. It’s my favorite gift ever.” His fingers trailed along her back, making her knees weak. “I particularly enjoy unwrapping it again and again.”

“Dad,” Timothy’s voice interrupted them as he entered the kitchen. “Please let Mum go. You’ll put me off my breakfast.”

Patrick’s head came around. “Sorry, son. I should think you’d have developed a stronger stomach by now.” Reluctantly, he released his wife and picked up his case. “I’m off. Late again tonight, I’m afraid. But tomorrow, it’s family time at the Observatory, then Tim, you’re off to a night at Colin’s and my little Angel will spend the night with Nonnatus.” With a quick tickle of the baby’s tummy, he was gone.

“Dad sure is chipper today,” Timothy grumbled.

Shelagh’s eyes danced as she tried to hide a dimple.

“Don’t you start, too,” the poor boy groused.

 


Fortunately, by the big day Patrick’s schedule settled back to normal, and after a chilly picnic at the observatory as a family, the no-longer-newlyweds were able to enjoy their dinner out. By nine o’clock that night, Patrick unlocked the door and ushered his wife into their home. The scent from the large bouquet of hyacinths and stephanotis wafted through the flat, welcoming them.

“I think it’s lovely you brought me the same flowers as our wedding, Patrick. You’re very romantic,” Shelagh confessed. She turned her back to him and let him slide her coat from her shoulders, and then reached up to remove her new pretty blue cap.

“Oh!” she cried as Patrick shifted from chivalrous to libidinous and pressed her body up against the wall. Not one to complain about her husband’s attentions, Shelagh happily responded.

Long moments later, Patrick rubbed his nose to hers. “As I recall, you didn’t give me a chance to make the first move a year ago.”

Shelagh couldn’t stop the blush that spread across her cheeks. “I was so nervous, dearest. I thought if I didn’t do something, I wouldn’t be able to do anything!”

He laughed and bent to lift her in his arms, heading to the bedroom door. “Oh, we would’ve figured something out, sweetheart. If I am certain of only one thing, that’s it.”

Sometime later, light filtered in through the open door, revealing a tangle of sheets and limbs. The passion that had raged only moments ago satisfied, their bodies slowly calming. Gingerly,  Shelagh moved her weight from above her husband and slid down alongside him. Patrick shifted to face her, propped up on his elbow.

He watched as her breathing slowed, and the flush faded from her cheeks. A year, he thought. One year ago tonight they had been so new to each other. He had known that being her husband was all he could hope for, that simply sharing his life with her would make him the happiest of men.

He never guessed that his prim wife, so long apart from the corporeal world, would be so ardent, so enthusiastic in their bedroom. Then again, he chuckled to himself, his Shelagh never did anything by halves. The joy of loving brought them even closer.

He kissed her lightly, and she smiled against his mouth. They lingered; glancing touches of lips and tongues fired more by intimacy than passion. Shelagh stretched contentedly and nuzzled her head against his shoulder.

Suddenly, Patrick sat up, sending Shelagh to the edge of the bed.

“I nearly forgot! Wait here,” he climbed out of bed and grabbed his dressing gown.

“No, Patrick. Stay,” his soft wife tempted.

He grinned wickedly. “I’ll just be a moment, love. Stay exactly as you are,” he told her as he headed out the door.

Shelagh sat up, pulling the sheets up as high as she could for modesty and reached for her glasses. The noises coming from the sitting room were strange, indeed. “Patrick, are you in the piano?” she laughed. He was definitely up to something, she thought. Spying his abandoned shirt on the floor, she scooped it up and slipped it on.

Practically dancing as he returned, Patrick sat on the bed beside his wife. “I’ll have to find a new hiding place. Tim wanted to know why the piano sounded so strange.” He stopped and took in the sight of his wife, hair tousled, lips swollen. “I like you in my shirt, my bold girl.” He held out his surprise.

“You already gave me a present, Patrick. The flowers are lovely.” Her eyes were on the inexpertly wrapped packages Patrick had set before her.

“That was for in front of the children.” With a lopsided grin, he reached over and tucked her hair behind her ear.

They had exchanged gifts at breakfast, Patrick receiving a formal portrait of Shelagh and the children; one copy for home, another for his surgery.

“I thought photographs, Patrick, for paper,” Shelagh had told him as she poured out more tea.

He had looked at her quizzically, seeming to not understand her meaning. Shelagh had continued, “Gifts are supposed to follow a theme. The first anniversary is paper. You know, like silver for twenty-five…”

“I reckon you’ll have to count the paper the flowers are wrapped in, Dad,” Timothy had teased.

Now, settling next to her on the bed, Patrick confided, “This is private, just between us. Open the little one first.”

Shelagh smiled, puzzled by his nervous state. The first package was small enough to fit in her hand and very light. She turned it over and untied the green ribbon, then began to peel the paper away.

Her breath caught in her throat, closing her lungs. The paper fell to the bed, revealing a new packet of cigarettes. Stunned, she looked up at him. “Patrick?”

His words rushed out. “Paper. I knew it was paper, Shelagh. The cigarettes, the packet, they’re paper.”

“But I don’t understand.” Surely Patrick wasn’t giving her cigarettes, not after Sunday’s talk?

“I’ve given them up, Shelagh. Cigarettes. I’m quitting for good this time.” His eyes glittered, anxiously searching her face. “I’ll need your help, Shelagh. I can’t do this without you.”

Shelagh stared at him; her pale eyes huge as the meaning of his words sank in, then let out a cry of joy. She sat up and wrapped her arms about his neck and clung tightly to him.

“Yes, Patrick. Oh, yes. Dearest, of course I’ll help. Anything.” She covered his face with kisses, laughing and crying all at once.

Laughing with her, Patrick held her away. “That’s not all. There’s one more present.”

Shelagh placed her hands on his cheeks. “I don’t need anything else, dearest. You’ve given me so much already.” She pressed her lips to his in a slow kiss.

Her body was warm pressed against his, and his hands slid under his shirt along her bare back, holding her tightly to him. His body stirred with his need for her again, but that would wait until after she opened the second gift. Coming to his senses, he returned his hands to her arms, making space between them. “Shelagh, open it.”

Wiping the tears from her face, Shelagh picked up the last gift. An extra large envelope tied with another bow, it gave no hint as to its contents. She slid her hand under the flap and pulled out its contents.

Few women are ever given an x-ray as a gift, and even Shelagh, with her own unusual history with the films, was confused.

Patrick waved a long finger in the air. “More light. You need to see it properly.”

He reached past her and flicked on the overhead fixture. Light flooded the room, and Shelagh took a moment to let her eyes adapt. Was this her x-ray from her time away, she wondered. She peered at the page and saw Patricks name, not hers across the top. Blood pounded in her ears as she felt a slow wave of panic come over her.

“Tuesday, when I said I was seeing a patient at the London? I was having this done. I’ve been to pulmonology this week.” He slid the film from her fingers, noticing how cold they had become.

“My lungs are clear, Shelagh. Between these and the tests done on the TB van, Dr. Parton is convinced there is no sign of any abnormalities in either lung, not even a shadow of an anything. Though he did give me a thorough lecture in the ‘Physician, Heal thyself” model.” He stopped speaking. Shelagh had gone very quiet.“Sweetheart?” He tucked his forefinger under her chin, coaxing her face to meet his.

Patrick knew Shelagh was a beautiful woman. It was a fact that his wife was empirically a truly beautiful woman. This knowledge wasn’t simply biased on his own observation; others were aware of it as well. The rest of the world could see her beauty: the glowing eyes and clear skin, her warm smile  and perfect form and more all added up to a loveliness unmatched.

He knew he was particularly attuned to her beauty because he loved her. He had known she was beautiful even when so little of her was exposed to him. When she became his Shelagh, he was astounded by her loveliness. She took his breath away when she smiled her answer to his proposal. She stunned him when he had turned to see her approaching him in the church.

He knew, more than anyone, how very lovely she truly was. He saw her beauty in her smiles at their children, as she lay asleep in their bed. The lovely serenity that crossed her face as she made their home, the winsome grace of her form as she walked, or did even the most mundane of tasks. And he alone had the privilege of seeing the beauty of her face when he loved her, sharing the joy of her body.

He knew right then that he had never seen her so glorious as at that moment, when she lifted her eyes to him, shining with love.

Next Chapter